On Saturday we brought the Jersey Shore to Leeds. We brought the oompa-loompa orange tanner, the Snooki hair poof, and fist-pumping straight down Otley Road. The sad thing was, I ended up looking like a typical club-going British girl. And I was trying to make myself look bad...
Like Halloween or Mifflin in Madison, an Otley run is a hedonistic tradition full of costumes (known here as 'fancy dress') and binge drinking. However, people go on these runs every single day. The basic rules are that you grab a group of trustworthy friends, dress in some crazy group costume that will prompt stares and drunken socialization, and hit 18 pubs along Otley Road. You typically start around 2pm and have twenty minutes to finish your pint (girls only need drink half pints) before shipping it off to the next location. I honestly don't know how people survive it.
Our group (a ragtag bunch of Sconnies, Minnesotans, and North Carolinians) decided to go as the crew from Jersey Shore and guido it up. Of course, no one in Britain knows what this TV show is nor understands the concept of a guido. Some of us put on fake accents to go with our tanner (mine morphing into more of a Jimmy Fallon-inspired Bostonian by the end of the night) and fist pumped whenever time appropriate. I don't wish to go into the exact details of the night. I wouldn't be the most reliable source for an accurate account. Really - how do you get through that?
I do remember meeting one local drunkard. His name was Frank and we was probably nearing seventy. I asked it he voted for Margaret Thatcher and we immediately shuffled out. We met two bunnies who were very enticed by our Snooki impersonations and I'm pretty sure we were racing a group of pirates throughout the night.
My words of advice if you attempt an 18 pub bar crawl, in February, and in heels? Down a tablespoon of butter and GODSPEED.
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